5 weeks & 3 days

Today, my little one is the size of a chocolate chip. Who knew that something so tiny could cause so much emotion. I pray that little chip keeps growing and progressing.

Currently, I am experiencing minor occasional cramps, slight headaches every once in a while, moodiness, and breast tenderness. I am full of anxiety and every little abnormal feeling turns into thoughts of complete despair. I just keep reminding myself that this is all in God’s hands.

My beta last Monday morning was 611. Thursday afternoon, it reached 2176. I have one more beta to do this coming Thursday afternoon. If all goes well, I will get to do my first sonogram the week of Feb 20th-24th. I’m so ready to see my little one. It seems that many of us women suffer a miscarriage at some point in life. I had my first miscarriage during my very first pregnancy, 11 years ago. I had a chemical pregnancy last year. I’m praying and praying. I try to take it as easy as possible most days but my anxiety makes it hard.

HT came home Sunday evening with a fever and severe congestion. Monday morning he woke up with a blazing 102 temp. Sore throat, chills, headache, congestion, sore throat with a cough….the dreaded FLU.

The FLU is literally the plague to me. I catch it every year weather I get vaccinated or not. The intensity is never better either way. I usually get hospitalized or I’m out of work for a minimum of a week. Being that I’ve taken off so much work for IVF, I can’t afford to catch the flu. For the past two days, I’ve been walking around the house with latex gloves and a medical mask. My hands are cracking and bleeding from how much washing or germ-xing I’ve been doing and I’ve gone through a can of Lysol in one day. I also work at a primary school where there are hundreds of kids that have been out daily over the past two weeks. I’m just trying to remain as isolated as possible. Not only do I not want to miss more work, I also don’t want to risk the birth defects/miscarriage that may accompany the high fever that the FLU brings.

Anyways, I will update on Friday when I get my final beta results.


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